Solitary Sanctuary

写在毕业前夕

2011-06-23T20:23:00.004+01:00

终于，真的终于。
想象了快四年的这一天，终于等到了。
心情怎样？雀跃，欣喜，幸福，安乐--所有所有的我都感觉到了！
有很多很多想写的，但却有点缺词
谢谢父母，家人和朋友一直的关爱，忍耐，鼓励．．．真得谢谢！
学业的句点，只是成长过程中许多逗点里的一个，
感恩其中的一切。
开心，真得开心。

Friday 13th

2011-05-13T22:19:00.005+01:00

It's a very special day indeed. One that mark the end of sleepless nights and most importantly, the perfect closure to the past 3 years and 9 months worth of effort.

If I could freeze time and keep it in a jar, I would definitely preserve a few hours from today...to remind myself of abundant blessings and love, as well as perseverance and patience. It wasn't easy and no, I didnt expect it to be. But was it worth the torment? I guess it was.

'You did very well!' and that itself wiped away all the tears, instantaneously!

I don't want to doubt the sincerity in the compliments, because they did make me feel very good, and I havent felt so in a long time. I know I could have done better. but it's ok, it's all over now :)

If I would to write about the whole journey that's led to this day, it'd probably take me a long time...but I think I should try someday, after it's all official.

God is good. He's especially good when the days are gloomy and there seems to be no way out...

and today, He's given me not one but two gifts that I would treasure for life.

Indeed, it's a once-in-a-lifetime experience and I'm glad I had the chance :)

Praise be to God and God only.

p/s: Friday the 13th is a black Friday and who says black's bad?? ;)

心情

2011-03-14T17:36:00.003Z

20110314--我爱你一生一世

浪漫吗？见仁见智吧！

没关系，那不是重点。　

一个月一篇文，少得可怜。　

今天不知道为什么想写写．．．当下心情。

日本地震海啸过了７２小时，电视上不断地播放当地的情况．．．

看了真的很难过。　

突然觉得人真的很渺小，我们可以做的也真的很少．．．

每每天灾让我对生命的态度一点点改变，对很多事情瞬间改观．．．

希望还没太迟吧！

只能说要珍惜！感恩！

追了一年的真人秀，爱上了别人的爱情，现在要结束了．．．

有点沮丧，有点可惜，有点不能释怀。

然后又想想，怎么会那么投入在从一开始就知道是假想的节目呢．．．？

可能是我那压抑的天真浪漫想要放肆一下下．．．？

只能说有时候现实是残酷的。

２０１１年快过了四分一，还真觉得快的可怕！

有很多很多想做的，但也还有很多很多还未完成的．．．

也因为这样每天都过的紧凑，充实。

压力没有间断过，但其中的满足感也不少，

我想，这就是所谓的生活吧！

活着不是理所当然的。

So it's done.

2011-02-16T16:32:00.006Z

So it's done and dusted.
I thought I'd be ecstatic but no,
more of a relief, more of a long sighhhhhh
one that let all pressure off my shoulders!
I could breath again!
I can't believe it.
I've imagined this day if not a thousand times, probably a hundred.
Although it's not entirely the end of everything,
and the next hurdle will probably be as stressful (if not more!)
I'm just glad I survived so far!
It was not easy, it was depressing.
I didnt see an end until...last night?
It has been a LONG journey...
The past month was the worst
(or maybe only then I realised how bad it was!)
I was exhausted.
I was nervous.
I was afraid.
I was everything but nothing positive.
It may not be a work of blood and sweat, but I assure you there were buckets of tears!
I'm glad tears come easily... because without, I might have just lost it.
I know I'm blessed, I know even better now.
It is difficult but it is possible.
I might have missed all sorts... I'm sure I gain too.
I'm glad it's done. I'm more than glad.
I just need time to let it settle... before it feels real.
I thank God.

一年之首

2011-01-01T23:12:00.005Z

一年的头一日，我什么都没做，懒洋洋地耗了一天...

只想在这一天变成昨天之前，在这留下一点什么给自己。

过去的一年，很多做得不够，做得不好，只能努力地在新的一年补上！

前面三百多个日子，有很多的看不见，但也有满满的期待！

不管今天是多么的平凡，明天还是一样的新鲜！

完成未完成的，继续要继续的，开始将开始的...

就这样翻阅2011年吧！

新年快乐

Rewind 2010, 2011 Start

2010-12-31T18:43:00.008Z

I've said this a hundred times, but I've to say it again...I can't believe it's the last day of 2010! (it's already 2011 back home as I'm saying this...so I know it's inevitable)

Let's do this the easiest way, chronologically:

January 2010

Spent almost the whole month finishing up last bits of work to be submitted for publication before heading home!

February 2010

幸福二月，在家过了农历新年 :)

March 2010

Left home (again...) to come back to more work! As far as I remember, it was a stressful month...

April 2010

One of my best friends (yes I have more than one BEST friend ;p) traveled all the way from NZ to see me! It was the best Easter present! I didnt know I could get so nervous waiting to see a friend at the airport after not seeing each other for years...imagine if it was a lover! I'm glad we managed to pick up from wherever we left and the familiarity was just natural...

May 2010

hmmm...to be honest, I can't remember much of this month. Probably just the very good weather (for once!) and the never-ending work...

June 2010

Invited to watch 'Trooping the Colour' by the cousin, and saw Prince Philip for the first time (may well be the only time). Men in uniforms were stunningly attractive after all :)
Visited London Zoo and for once, London seemed considerable to live in...

July 2010

It should be July when I had those BBQs in the park and the Saturday afternoons sitting in the sun...or was it June?
Again, one of those less significant months overwhelmed by work and the month was gone before I even realised!

August & September 2010

Busy first half to make up for the rest of the days of leisure. Parents' visit! woots!
Never expected them to come before the graduation, but thank God they did! It was definitely a boost of energy to help me get through the following months...
Revisited Brussels, Amsterdam and Paris.
Visited St Andrews for the first time and had a surprise!
Had the award winning Anstruther fish and chips and it was REALLY good!
Lotsa pampering and TLC from the parents!
Granted my first publication :))

October 2010

Tough time getting my head down on work and work ONLY!

November 2010

First trip to the US and was not too impressed
Crossed the border to Mexico and thought it's the most courageous thing I ever did!
I turned 27 and celebrated it alone (without a cake) at the beautiful Coronado beach.
Snow came early in full force! Coldest winter in 40 years =(

December 2010

Birthday surprise came 2 weeks late but it was nonetheless great!
Every weekend was packed with food, chats and mahjong! ;p
Couldnt help but to get into the celebrative mood (and still tried VERY hard to keep the work going...)
First ever proper Christmas dinner with a fireplace, turkey, sprouts, Christmas pudding and everything else that you have for Christmas! Thanks to my colleague and her family :)
Secret Santa gave me a vintage muffin kit and I went into a muffin frenzy since!
Very spontaneous with dinner/shopping plans nowadays...less organised in other words ;p

Only at this time of the year, I realise how much has happened in the past 365 days, some were less significant than others, some just stuck out like a sore thumb! Whether or not new year resolutions were made in the beginning of the year, I think the more important thing is to look back and still manage a smile!

I remind myself to count my blessings, each and every day. I thank God that I am healthy and well, despite the ups and downs and all that in between! My memory may fail me as the days pass, but my faith never.

Now let the New Year begins with a grateful heart and a sky high spirit!

Cheers to family, friends, good health and everything great!

Happy 2011 :)

'tis the season to be jolly!

2010-12-24T22:44:00.012Z

Hark the heralds angels sing! Glory to the new born King!

It's a day to remember how blessed we are, or I am. I spent the day with friends as well as ample time with myself. Snuggling in bed with my new 'pet' and watched 'Eat Pray Love'. I quietly made a pact with myself while watching the film, which I hope to keep up to for as long as I could and not give up! Yup, my little Christmas wish :)

Suddenly the dust from yesterday seems to settle.
At peace, that's how I feel and what Christmas promises.
Peace at heart.

Life may be chaotic at times, may be suffocating at others, but not ALL the time. At least I have my family, friends, a roof on top of my head, food on the table, clothes to keep me warm and so much of everything else! Yes, life is indeed good. I reassure myself once again.

My best wishes to you and your loved ones.
May the blessings from above reach everyone of you!

又有一点...

2010-12-21T17:23:00.004Z

想回家了。

是因为天气还很冷吗？

还是想逃？

逃到一个不用想晚餐吃什么，衣几时洗，有车载的地方...

看到别人的游记，又想是不是可以有一天丢下所有的，酷酷地去流浪...

烤了饼干，麦芬，又觉得心情还好...

我到底要什么？现在有点混乱...

明天可能会好一点...?

应该会。

A belated surprise!

2010-12-04T00:42:00.005Z

My birthday was a good two weeks ago but a surprise came today!

'Better late than never!'. I can't agree more!

A simple meet-up-dinner with my only girlfriends here turned out to be a well-planned-belated birthday surprise for me! ^^ Complete with the best cake in town, two (yes two's sufficient ;p) lit candles and an old-fashioned birthday song playing in the background (in a Chinese restaurant!)

I was bit stunned I must say...cos I usually know when a surprise's coming my way...but not this time. My hair's oily, my face's not made up, my eyes were tired...I had 10 min right after work to get ready for this night out. I really wasn't expecting any pictures to be taken. I was caught off guard! But I really didn't mind :)

I have to say this is more than a birthday celebration for me. I'm probably at one of my most stressful periods in life now and I am not looking my best. From the pictures, I could see that I've aged. I've a lot on my mind at the moment and the bitterly cold winter just doesn't help. I'm reminded again of how fortunate I am to have friends. Friends whom I never thought of making when I first came to this city. We met through the most unexpected circumstances. We became friends almost instantaneously. We got closer over the years. We make a part of each others' weekends. We're very comfortable with each others' company. We know quite well that this will make a huge part of our memories together, in this place, at this age.

A place is made better with the right people around. Thank you.

San Diego

2010-12-01T18:42:00.039Z

I need to get this done before the calendar changes and the stories will be of yesteryear! Let's start with the first impression of San Diego... Bright and sunny! Yes, that's definitely a PLUS :)

At such a place, work seems irrelevant and even the joggers/cyclists look better!

I had a free morning, so I took a stroll around and had this really good coffee at 'It's a Grind'. Had a bagel with ham and egg and cheese, the first of many bagels after! Visited the local supermarket and wished to buy almost everything...hehe...just to taste ;p

Love the trolley! I must say public transport was pretty convenient. Get a 3-day-pass for $12 and it brings you almost everywhere on the bus and trolley!

To prove the point, the 3-day-pass brought me to:

1. San Diego Zoo I love zoos! Singapore Zoo, London Zoo, now San Diego Zoo! Heard that it's one of the best (not the cheapest...) in the world, so why not??

Imaginary Safari ;p

Lunch while watching the elephants :)

Cutest lil boy with the most charming seal!

Giraffes-my all time favourite!

Flamingos! (just like the giraffes, I never get tired looking at these marvellously coloured birds! I must say these at SD Zoo were the pinkest I remember seeing)

Watcha' lookin' at?? nom nom nom

I still cant believe the first panda I saw was in the US and not China!

2. The Old Town One of those places that every tourist guide tells you to visit and you make sure you do!

My beef jerky and a good ol' rootbeer!

A movie set! (a hotel actually ;p)

3. Shelter Island

Not really an island, but a neighbourhood near the sea where you see yachts and marinas and you get the idea? Definitely my kinda place, which reminds me a bit of home :)

The start of a very grey (and wet) weekend!

Downtown San Diego in the background

4. Cabrillo National Monument and Point Loma Lighthouse

The journey took longer than the stay, but the scenery from the cliff made it all worthwhile!

This is where the first European set foot on the West Coast

The Lighthouse est. 1855

and the next destination is...*drum rollssssss*

5. MEXICO!!!

Yes, MEXICO! okay...just the border city, Tijuana, but still, MEXICO!!!

It's more than a month since the trip but I could remember every bit of it! Not that the rest of San Diego is less exciting but this is...out of the world! Okay, here goes...

I was planning to cross the border before I started the trip...but after a week of chaotic travelling and conference, I decided not to. I thought there wouldn't be enough time, and I was told to go visit the Sea World instead. So yup, killer whales and dolphins sounded like a great idea! BUT plans just couldnt keep up to changes...such as the weather! San Diego's around 11 days of rain in a year (as I was told) and guess what?? I was so lucky to witness one of them =( It rained and rained and rained...non stop for a night...and I thought it'd stop in the morning and I'd have time for Sea World...no it didnt stop! So what was there to do on a rainy day, which just happened to be my last day in SD?? Take the trolley and go to the furthest it took me! I wasn't sure if I'd really make it over to Tijuana during the 45 min journey...I was contemplating...I was slightly worried...I was not prepared!

(this is me trying to recall on the experience after 3 months...)

So where were we?...

Right crossing the border...basically the sign MEXICO at the border was just TOO huge to ignore! I knew at that very moment that if I didnt cross the line, I'll regret! So I did!

First thing I saw was a decent tourist information centre--so I went in...just in search for a map or at least some directions (yes I was that NOT prepared!). There was only one guy working (ahuh...) and he told me not to worry, it's a SAFE place to be (I doubted every bit of it since the lady in the bus AND the old man at the bus stop told me the complete opposite!). Anyway, I still went ahead (not like I could turn back, since the gate back to the US is on the other side of town!)

Okay, I really dont have much to tell besides how nervous I was! The place was just very....different? Maybe it's just me and my wild imagination, and the fact that I was alone. I didnt feel the same when I was in Spain alone...that sorta tells how different it is! All I remember was dashing through town, ignoring every person who tried to sell me something, head down and wished I looked less Asian! However, it was an out of the world experience nonetheless! and would I do it again?? YES! (but hopefully not on my own ;p)

Here are the very few pics to prove that I'm not making things up ;p

It's MEXICO baby!

Mexicano. Ahuh.

There was a parade, so lots of cops!

(This post was from almost a year ago...and I can hardly remember what's what now...)

Accommodation of two ends.

From $250 a night and butler sending bottles of mineral water to the room every morning...

The US Grant

View from the room

to 4 beds dorm and making your own pancakes for breakfast.

The Point Loma Hostel

It's luxury and leisure both ways :)

(No idea how to wrap the post up...just gonna leave it open-ended ;p)

Jetlag and all that's behind it...

2010-11-24T04:01:00.003Z

It's 4am now. And I've been awake since an hour ago. The jetlag's kicked in after all (despite the desperate effort to avoid it). So what is there better to do than to write about the cause of this...

The trip across the Atlantic Ocean to the United States of America (now it sounds bit surreal, somehow ;p) is my first. And unfortunately, the journey didnt start too well. My worst so far! It was an early (supposedly) flight and I'd to be at the airport by 6am. I was there on time BUT only to find out that the flight's delayed for two hours!! and as if that's not bad enough, both connecting flights after had to be re-scheduled!!! (!!!) So the first (more to come later...) queue started. It went on for 2 hours. Yup, 2 hours of standing in line just to make sure we could get to San Diego within the same day. With the boss (as well as the long line of passengers) being extraordinarily calm, my Arabic colleague and I were...let's say... 'impressed'? We both agreed that if this was to happen back home, it'll definitely be a different scene. Angry businessmen, frustrated 'tai-tais', wailing kids...you get the idea? The boss said they're just known for being ludicrously polite, and especially in queues ;p

And when I thought we were finally ready to be checked in, BAM! System breakdown!! Meaning another hour plus in line (told you there's more!) to get us checked in individually on ONE machine! I tell you, by this time, I wasnt even thinking much about the trip anymore. I just want to get on my first (of three!) flight and fly!! sighhhhhhhhhhhhh

After one of the most chaotic and exhausting mornings, finally got on the plane (FINALLY!) about 20 min before boarding time! I've always been the kind of traveller who gets at least an hour to stroll at the duty free shops before I get on board, but not this time! But at least the breakfast on board was good...heh...or maybe I was just too hungry? it was past noon and we were STILL in the UK >< even writing this now wears me out ;p

The in-flight services were not great. Entertainment was rubbish. Sound system was as bad. Food...dont even wanna go there. Pasta and pizza for lunch and dinner (yes, pizza! with NO toppings but just tomato sauce and cheese). But if you're a soda person, then cool--they serve 350ml cans of all sorts! and no pudding to go with any meals, just some lousy biscuits -_-" I guess at the time of the flight, I was really not the happiest passenger...zzz...

Pasta. Yuck! (the salad was alright ;p)

After 8 long hours (and only an hour of sleep), Chicago airport for transit. There came our next queue. This time for passport clearance. I dont even want to go into the details of the queue. It's just another black spot. And for how long you ask? Not bad, 2 and half hours? #^&"@*!! and we had 3 hours transfer time to get on the next flight!! Yes, 30 min in an airport in one of the biggest US cities! We ran!! All I remember of Chicago airport was probably the shuttle train. Period.

Four hours to San Diego. 2 Hours time difference. 8 Hours behind time from point of first departure. Totally messed up. This guy who sat beside me tried to have some small chats, sorry chap, wrong time! I was probably my meanest ;p Fell asleep even before the plane took off. and slept through the whole flight! That was how exhausted I was.

You've no idea how relieved I was when we touched down in San Diego and got to the hotel. Safe and sound and a king size bed waiting! There and then I thought I'll not make another trip to this continent if not for desperate purposes.

It's 5am now. I should try go back to sleep. Enough sour recollections of the trip. Better stuff comes next ;)

Sunny 27!

2010-11-18T05:04:00.006Z

Today I turn 27. Not a significant age of any sort, but definitely a special one for me.

If there's one reason for it to be extra special, it's the SUN :)

Having spent the past three birthdays in cold and gloomy Glasgow, this time it's sunny California for a change! WooHoo!~~

New York's always the first in my US-city-to-visit list, but I guess life's full of surprises :) and what more a birthday in San Diego...!! I guess no present could beat a trip across the Atlantic :D

Although having said that, the journey here was really not one to be remembered with a smile. Will write on another day when it's not my birthday ;p

My feet are hurting like mad now and I really need to sleep...BUT just to make sure I remember this day better than the others...I shall write on what I did to celebrate this special day.

Checked out from a 5-star hotel into a backpackers' hostel is really not the nicest thing to do on a birthday...but oh well, it only makes me feel more like I'm on a vacation rather than work ;p Hopped on the water taxi that took me to the 'island' Coronado. Walked my way into town, along Orange Ave and ended up at the Sun Deck Bar of Hotel Del Coronado (est 1888, go read on it!). Cant afford a room at the hotel, so treated myself to a drink and chili cheese fries! and again...the size of the food portion was just...overwhelming -_-

Left after a stroll on the beach and watched the sun sets...magnifique!~

Walked around town and splurged *oops* but it's my birthday!! :D

I really need to go sleep now cos I could feel my eyes closing...although I'd love the day to last!

The pics will come later...and will add on the extra bits if I still remember by then ;p

Happy Birthday to me and I am happy indeed :)

This Fall

2010-10-26T20:30:00.012+01:00

I havent been keeping this up to date for a while now...not that life is not interesting enough to make into words, but rather too much to put into mere sentences.

Just a few things to remember about this Fall before it's gone...

It's been a month. To wake up to the alarm and not you, to come home to no one, to not have meals ready on the table, to not hold your hands walking down the lane, to not sit on the sofa and laugh, to not cuddle and be a baby again...oh how I miss you!
But it's ok, I had a month. I'm fine.

Am I an introvert or an extrovert? I'm quite sure people around me would agree on the latter without blink of an eye, but today I discovered that I might have just hidden the former a bit too well...?
It could just be a split 'me'. I shall find out.

Words of encouragement came when I least expected them.
You told me to keep soldiering on!
I just smiled and nodded. It was a loss of words' moment.
That simple line made my day!
And I know it will go a long way...all the way until the very end :)

Few more days and the clock shall change again.
It didnt feel like the first time, but it still makes a point.
The days will be short and most of the time, dark.
But now I expect, and not fear.
That's the difference.

Fall must have the most charming shades of seasons.
It may be a short one, a cold one...but is never one to be forgotten.
A transition it is. A step forward it is.
After all, it is one of the most beautiful.

May your October ends well and may my favourite November unwraps

:)

Therapeutic Munches

2010-10-06T18:26:00.003+01:00

My 'edible' therapy :)

何年何月

2010-09-25T19:14:00.002+01:00

心情总是紧张的...不是那种一下下的紧张，而是无时无刻的。
很想知道何年何月可以完成...完成这让我快要受不了的‘大志’...
唉...
一定要坚持！一定！

This is the day!

2010-08-05T18:09:00.005+01:00

Old pic, but it's how I feel :D Whee!~~

This is a day that started off messy...I forgot about almost every single thing on the list...poured a glass of juice to go with my sandwich and only realised it to be sitting there waiting to be drunk 2 hours later...made a 20 day-in advance-birthday wish...and the list goes on...

BUT before it ends, God sends me the BEST piece of news, which I've been waiting for the past months of the year! My very first article is accepted to be published =D

It coincidentally commemorates my 1065 days here, doing what I chose to do, a decision I sometimes wonder if it's right. Now it all seems right!

God is good, always.

Treasure

2010-08-01T18:47:00.007+01:00

Go forth and we shall see blooms like nothing we've seen before!

同感

2010-07-12T10:13:00.006+01:00

看看这，再看看5分钟的爱情故事

很相似，但还是那句...感动！

我想...最简单也是最幸福吧 :)

Look up!

2010-06-23T21:11:00.005+01:00

Have you looked at the sky lately?
Or were you too tired to hold up your head?
Have you felt the breeze lately?
Or were you walking too fast to notice?
Have you smelled the rain yesterday?
Or you didnt know it showered?

Slow down, look up!

All it takes is a pace slower :)

夜幕

2010-06-23T20:57:00.005+01:00

夏，摄于晚上11时　

曾经几时觉得天从来没亮过，
又何时觉得太阳怎么还不下山...
天黑，天亮，
你可曾留意过? 珍惜过?

Food 食物

2010-06-23T20:45:00.004+01:00

...is not to be taken for granted

...得来不易

快乐

2010-06-18T18:47:00.004+01:00

快乐是什么？
快乐是看见别人笑，自己笑得更灿烂
快乐是跟别人分享，独乐乐不如众乐乐
快乐是费一点点心，得到大大的满足
快乐是让身边的人也快乐！

以上是我花1磅换来的快乐！
其实，快乐真的可以很简单 =)

Suddenly, Summer's here

2010-05-23T15:37:00.011+01:00

Spring has come and gone...

No more blossoms,
but dandelions to be blown!

.
.
.

From my point of view 1

From my point of view 2

From my point of view 3

.
.
.

and suddenly, Summer's here :)

Impromptu Sweetness

2010-05-08T20:56:00.008+01:00

An exquisite and scrumptious dessert in 5 minutes!

You'll need:
1. A glass tumbler/a champagne flute/a brandy glass/some sorta glassware?
2. Crushed digestive biscuits
3. Fresh or canned fruits
4. Creme fraiche/yogurt/double cream/whipped cream/mascarpone
(healthy--->less healthy BUT sinfully good options ;p)
5. Drizzle of honey/sprinkle of nuts/shaves of choc/let imagination does its best!

Layer them up in the glass and ta-daaaaa...!!

I seriously think culinary art's what I should sought after all this while...hmm...

The Substitute

2010-05-02T18:40:00.008+01:00

The Boyfriend Blazer in place of the Boyfriend :)

This one's definitely less hassle to maintain ;p

I met Jodi

2010-04-28T21:52:00.006+01:00

Picoult that is :)

First time meeting an author. One whose books I read. Not ALL of them, which may make me less of a SUPER fan but I'd say I've read enough to make me anticipate her stories. Seeing her in person and hearing her read her newest release made it all...real.
A storyteller indeed. A brilliant one.

I had a LONG day at work. I'm having an awfully sore knee and I don't know why. I'm extremely tired.

but but...

This made the day!

I'm glad I could STILL find happiness in simplicity :)

Saturday Sweetness

2010-04-25T15:10:00.003+01:00

Not my strongest, but working on it :)

Who minds an overload of choc chips??

Art is free, free is art

2010-04-24T13:13:00.012+01:00

So as the title says.

This morning after my addictive-grocery-shopping trip to the farmer's market, walked across the street and found this. The display in its window caught my attention and its name told me I must go in and have a look!

Welcome Home it is.

A lady greeted me from behind the counter and I told her I was to have a look around...and surprisingly she let me do just that--look around on my own, without constantly checking over my shoulders to see what would I possibly need (you know how irritating that is!). So I did. Walked around...and fell in love. In love with the various art pieces, in love with the vast genre of knick knacks, in love with the random scribbles and notes, in love with the freedom to appreciate effort. In love with art. For me, art can be anything and this place defines that. No particular theme, no rigid rules, no time border, no colour restriction, no medium limited. Nothing but a collection of personal jewels.

Went upstairs, there was an art exhibition. It was nothing close to what I imagined. Simple, open space with scrapbooks, papers, notes, sketches, photographs, drawings and letterings hanging from strings, taped on the walls, kept in the shelves and lying on the floor...Purely freedom. I was reminded of my own scribbles, my own 'poems', my own little notes...my own world of art.

Came home, read Wei's entry on 3191 miles apart and thought..."It's art...a record of life...". Next thing that happened was, to me, very much an omen...
I saw their new book '3191 A year of evenings' and thought how sentimental it is to have photos that remind you of every evening in a year...seconds before that thought fades away, guess what I stumble upon at Welcome Home online store?? This.

and of course, I bought it :)

Wei and I have never met each other, neither would I say we know each other well. But there's a mutual interest, an agreeable mind and thoughts that could travel miles. I trust in her pick of books, her views through the lense, her taste on food, her values of life. I feel I do know you, after all. One day, we shall meet and I shall share my 'evenings' with your 'mornings'?

Aint life just sweet?

Project Onigiri

2010-03-20T15:39:00.014Z

Staying in for the weekend? Bored? No idea what to eat?? Try this!

Homemade Onigiri

Easy peasy as it says on any recipes you could find on the net, I referred to this one:
http://www.justhungry.com/2007/01/onigiri_omusubi_revisited_an_e.html

I was inspired by the ones from Jusco, which I had recently while waiting for my flights...made LCCT less stressful in many ways ;p

All you need is cooked rice (preferably jap/sushi rice), water, salt, cling film, something to use as a mould (I used a muffin tin ;p), bonito flakes (similar or optional), nori or dried seaweed (optional), your choice of fillings (optional) and lotsa imagination!

I made these!

Can you spot the heart-shaped one?? Say awwwww ^ ^

This is, to me, the new-found best lunch/dinner/snack/party food idea. Why??

1. It takes less than 30 min to prepare (minus rice cooking time)
2. Simple ingredients (Rice, salt and soy sauce? Enough said)
3. Easy to keep (just keep it wrapped in cling film til ready to eat!)
4. Simple to eat (fill up your bento! or put them in your pockets and go for a picnic :D)
5. Make round ones and top with sashimi, smoked fish or pickles. Delicioussss!~
6. Can be modified into yaki onigiri and MOS-inspired burger with your choice of toppings!

Rice ball ready to be moulded or kept til ready to eat

Yaki onigiri (锅巴饭团，哈哈！）

Bento! (my current hobby ;p)

My memory-based-recreation of my very first MOS burger :)

Magnifique, non??

and and...heart-shaped onigiri in all sizes for your loved ones? Absolute sweetheart! <3
(How to: just follow the steps in making a triangular onigiri and give it a slight press with your finger to make that dent on top of the 'heart'. Voila!)

Now go make yourself some! Have fun!!

Blooms

2010-03-13T11:50:00.006Z

It's a sign
A sign of longer days
A sign of brighter mornings
A sign of warmth
A sign of life

I wish...

2010-03-03T14:53:00.002Z

I know I can't stop time, but I still wish I could.

This is what I call 'post-home-break-syndrome' and it's hazardous.

My emo-ness' starting to overflow...and I can't help it.

恭贺新禧

2010-02-13T13:24:00.006Z

新春佳节

阖家团圆

万象更新

虎虎生威

恭喜!恭喜!

心理作用

2010-01-21T18:47:00.010Z

同学毕业时，给了我两罐子的西洋参片。
说了一句，“我就靠这毕业了，你也要一样！”
当下的感动，久久不散。

过了好几个月，终于泡了喝，想说提一提神！
它真的发效了...
是参片真有如此功能，还是纯粹个人心理作用，我不知道。

但我相信是祝福在作祟 =D

往往累得想放弃的时候，小小的快乐就能发出最大的功效！

零下

2010-01-05T10:01:00.005Z

很不好受，很难过。

想.回.家

Let's start simple!

2010-01-01T21:00:00.003Z

Today marks the beginning of the second decade in the 21st century. 2010.

It's one of those very simple days for me.
No alarm to wake me up, no one to rush me about, no thoughts on work, no worries bout what to cook...nothing to mess the day up :)

Simplicity at its best. I had a hearty brunch, I talked to some of my favourite people, I watched what I like most, I had a long shower, I wore my new PJ to bed. I'm happy :)

I only hope for the BEST in the year ahead.

Happy New Year!

Highlights of 2009

2009-12-31T12:55:00.021Z

It's this time of the year when we look back and go,

"What have I done??"

The year started off with work and ends with work, but I managed to catch my breath here and there and in between!

This must be the sunniest year since I got here! Don't get too excited if I've just made you think Glasgow's more than a month of continuous sunshine and temperature above 25C--No, it hasn't (Thank God, or else the world's REALLY melting!) But undeniably I had quite a few sunny days this year and one warm enough to have a picnic in the park! That's EXCELLENT at Glasgow's standard :D

A very short weekend trip to Amsterdam at probably my worst time of this year was full of laughter and flowersSsSs! 7 hours in the world's largest flower garden made everything else seems less significant! Lying in the park, telling my friend of 13 years my worst nightmare and got a hug telling me all will be fine--nothing beats that! And she's right, I'm fine :)

My 10 days in Spain paid off my hard work! The tapas, the sangria, the beach, the sun, the people--everything bout Spain speaks VACATION! I got my phone stolen on my very last day in Madrid, I cried it off right there right then ;p I'm definitely going back!

I don't know if I've worked hard enough this year, but I'm thankful to see results. I learn to reward myself...somehow :) Berlin and Hamburg made the break!

Sometimes just a proper English tea at a posh tea room makes a difference! Of course, the company too :)

I did this last year and I thought I wouldn't do it again, but I did. I guess it kinda give me the 'annual assessment' on my own health and well-being...it's just very inspiring to see families (and dogs!) running together, fathers cheering their kids, the less fortunate in their wheelchairs 'run' with all the rest! It's a way I tell myself, "I'm glad that I'm alive and running!" I shall do it again next year!

I've been waiting for a white Christmas since...forever? God's heard me and I had a white (and VERY cold) one this year! Fair enough, no snow falls on Christmas day itself, but it did a few times right before and after. If there's 12 days of Christmas, then I had snow on most of them *grinZ*

A year is never too real if it's only the ups and not downs, vice-versa. I had mine, a good number of both. But when I try recap on the year itself, it still brings a smile to my face. I guess that's what matters? It is difficult to think of the good times when you're at your worst, but the fact is you've still had them. I learn to grow out of my own misery and appreciate the present. God is good, He always is. He's given me a year of blessings and love. I shall be joyful.

So it's a wrap!

May your 2009 be fruitful and 2010 even better!

From Glasgow with love.

A White Christmas

2009-12-25T01:28:00.009Z

Finally.

My 1st one in Glasgow (per se) AND it's white :D Decided to play host!

Cooked what to me is 'proper' for Christmas and it turned out brilliant! Not everything was from scratch of course, but MOST were! I made a chocolate tart which I seriously thought wasn't edible til I had my first bite. Surprise surprise! It tasted exactly as what I've imagined :) First attempts do need lotsa luck ;p

I'm thankful for friends who came to make it happened! I've had this thought of throwing a dinner party in mind for a long time, and I made it (a small one)!

'tis the season of giving. Indeed.

It meant a lot to me as to share what I myself think is good and enjoyable. It is simply rewarding :)

Friendship's often taken granted of, and it shouldn't be.

May you all had a wonderful Christmas!

God bless.

I'm 26 today...

2009-11-17T18:04:00.003Z

and I don't feel it at all...in a good way :)

One year can be long and short at the same time, this one year's been a learning curve but definitely a blessed one!

Cheers to life and all that it offers!!

相知相惜

2009-11-14T22:28:00.005Z

两年前，我们是陌生人，
两年间，我们彼此认识，
两年后，我们促膝而谈。

我感动，我感激。

天下无不散的宴席，我明白，所以我祝福。

真的，相惜总在离别时。

且珍惜，保重。

My German Experience

2009-11-03T17:41:00.038Z

When Germany and the rest of Europe (and a big part of the world) are celebrating the 20th year since the Berlin Wall fell, I'm writing my own German experience.

So I went to two German cities in a week, Hamburg and Berlin. They're of course two of the many BIG cities in Europe as well as the world, but it wasn't my plan to visit them first among the many other places in the country. I just did.

Arrived in Hamburg on a very foggy Saturday and the first impression wasn't great. Most of it was because the gloom reminded me of where I left to go on a vacation, so no, just wasn't ideal to see the same grey sky plus the even colder chill! Had a hard time looking for place to eat, cos everywhere we went, we see WURST! Sausages and MORE sausageesssss!!

Wurssttttttttt

Don't get me wrong, German sausages are as good as they're known to be BUT how can you eat sausages ALL day?? So we came to a conclusion that high rise cities as such just tend to be more cosmo, i.e. you get all sorts BUT local delicacies...we still had a good dinner after all and it's Italian *rolled eyes*

Italian in Germany

We were very lucky to be in Hamburg on a Sunday as it's the day where one of their biggest Fishmarkt (yes, fishmarket...which sells fish AND everything else!) took place at the port. I wish I could understand German when loud auctions were heard all over the place! Be it veges or fruits or fish, they were selling them in an auction manner. It was definitely an eye opener! The even bigger surprise came when we stepped into the old auction hall at the end of the market where bands were jammin' to rock and pop! Yes, live music at a fishmarket o.O So yea, it changed our thoughts of Hamburg, right there right then. If you ever visit the city, make sure you include a Sunday and go early to feel the crowd while smelling the coffee and fish ;)

Hamburg-on a good day ;)

Hamburg's a port city. So its port does make up a huge part of its sceneries (as much as I'm concerned). It was beautiful on a sunny day (we were lucky to have one out of our 3 days' stay). Went to a yacht/boat sale and pretend to know..LOL..and ended up eating...yup, you guess it right...WURST! :D Took a ferry and went along the coast on a rainy day wasn't a good idea but always worth the experience!

---

Tiergarten, Berlin

Berlin came next after a 3-hour-slept-throughout bus ride (Tip 1: Get your tickets online to save the fuss! Applies to most European countries I suppose. Best advice comes from tourist forum, e.g. Trip Advisor etc). Even colder. Not happy. But the hotel made our day. 4-star service at a hostel bunk bed price, we had every reason to be jolly! (Tip 2: www.priceline.co.uk, recommended based on my own very pleasant experience) Both cities offer very good public transportation at a reasonable price (Tip 3: If you're travelling in a group of more than two, do look out for Group Fare which would save you quite a bit!) Found the hotel in no time, which is a relief!

Nh West Berlin

If you've not heard of Berlin, you might have heard of the Wall instead? That's how famous it is! First glimpse of it came right after we reached the city centre. And I thought...so this is it? (as of many of those who've been to Berlin would say the same...) BUT I must say I was wrong. Lunch was Italian AGAIN >.< I guess that's how much Germans like Italian? It was at Vapiona at Potsdamer Platz, food was brilliant for a good price! Everything was cooked right in front of your eyes and almost everything's self serviced, not much to complain for such a location AND atmosphere :) Walked through the city and ended up at the Holocaust Memorial site. You might have seen it in pics and not realise it, but a visit is definitely worth the time. It's disturbingly sad but at the same time a reminder...of the past...and for Berlin, it's merely 20 years ago. The city was divided then, today it's reunited. It's difficult to acknowledge what human have once done to their own kind, for no reason, but because you were of a certain heritage. And today, it is for us to think and to decide whether to forgive or not to...it is hard but we shall. Just because history told us to.

A bit of a reminder

Faces of the Past

I didnt expect a trip to be so educational. Yea, I've no better word for it. Might sound like a put off to many, but I think history makes Berlin a city of unique characteristics today. It's just intriguing to see what human can do to their own kind, for no reason at many times. Went on a FREE guided tour the next day (Tip 4: Many European cities have this sorta tour and it IS totally free. Guides work on a tip-basis and I assure you, after my few trips, you'd find it worth giving a token of appreciation after) I quote our guide, Nickolai (a Bulgarian): " Seeing Berlin today and thinking how it was 20 years ago, you can't help but to think what would happen in the next 20? Scary thought..." It is so true. The skyscrappers represent worldclass architectectures and massive development, but when you turn around and see the remains of the wall...you just wonder...how much human can do and at the same time destroy. Berlin represents freedom to the Germans and many of the European countries. As an Asian, I'm just glad I understand better now.

Fall in Germany is definitely the most beautiful I've seen so far. The colours of the leaves are just amazing.The prettiest palette of red, yellow and orange. The air was crisp and chilly. The kinda autumn I've always imagined :)

Gendarmenmarkt

In front of Reichstag

Nope, the German language still doesnt appeal much to me. I survived the week with 'Danke! Danke!' and that's bout it ;p I STILL managed to find my way to the best of Germany...

Pork knuckle, mash and sauerkraut

and of course...

The best brew in town!

That's 500ml of good German beer, which I managed to drink til the last drop...but not the meat. It was HUGE!! Pork knuckle is not much of a Berlin-thing anyway...hehe

Thus ends my German story. For now :)

Berlin wall never looks the same to me again.

赏月

2009-10-03T20:14:00.002+01:00

圆月，星星，草地，还有我。
望着那亮亮的光体，有满满的幸福。
原来月亮可以很美，快乐可以很简单...

Then & Now

2009-09-17T16:27:00.004+01:00

Then,
When eyecream wasn't necessary,
When late nights didn't cause aches the next day,
When dark circles were not of worries,
When lines and spots were no where to be seen,
Oh then, it was young & sweet.

Now,
When the world looks bigger than before,
When hidden potentials are discovered,
When goals seem to be nearer in reach,
When dreams start to be realised,
Oh now, the present is what matters.

P/S: Try guess what's the year difference between the two pics on top? ;)

Restless

2009-09-07T12:37:00.004+01:00

Do you feel that?

It's like you've a dozen things in your head that you wanna get done, yet not able to.

I do. Right now.

So easily agitated. So need more concentration.

Oh was it cos I had a hard time falling asleep last night?

Most probably.

Blame it on the caffeine.

Yup, it's your fault!

Artsy Fartsy Weekend @ The Fringe 2009

2009-08-19T13:38:00.010+01:00

An affair of arts, street-friendly arts, impromptu arts, global arts, everyone's arts, my sort of arts.

From the lady with a silver ball

and one who retreats from the 17th century to send a text at the street's corner

to zombies from hell o.O

A bored Vampire

Singing Froggies

Very good looking Japanese drummer ^^

Drunk teen girl giving out leaflets, anyone?

An eerie man looking out for his next victim?? *brr*

A blondie strapped to the pole

Elmo!!

Picasso in Scotland

I-dunno-what-is-he

Heavenly Voices

Proud Scotsman

Striking Stripey Socks

The Black Widow

Sexiness redefined

Inspirational Blues

Tell me, how often do you see Spiderman driving a Mini??

Now that's what I call a weekend ;)

P/S: You still have the rest of the month if you plan to visit!! :D

Reflection

2009-08-07T23:08:00.006+01:00

I look upon the sky,
The clouds say HI;
I turn the pages,
The story ages;
I glance at my cover,
A ladybug climbs over;
Nothing more, nothing less;
All but just,
Reflections of summer.

Another year today...

2009-08-05T16:29:00.004+01:00

The Path

Time does fly when you pay least attention to it. It's another year and now it's a total of two. If you're in a relationship, you know how significant an anniversary is. So is today to me.

I've grown out of my own grumbles about the awful weather and this summer's been exceptionally warm (i.e. slightly above 20 C for more than 10 days over a span of 3 months ;p)! It's been a very eventful year I ought to say. All sorts happened! Good and bad, sweet and bitter, surprises-pleasant and not so...all that makes life worth living ;)

I had my happiest and my lowest this year. I really had everything and more. I understand myself in better depth and I've realised my abilities beyond my own expectations. I overcome hurdles and bumps. I had disappointments but also encouragements. I had so much. So much to be worded.

I only know I've to see everyday as a blessing. Now that I could vaguely see the light at the end of the tunnel, all I have to do is to walk towards it. It's not gonna be easy, but it's possible.

May the journey continues...

OK yet not okay ;p

2009-07-15T20:30:00.005+01:00

I was reading this...

I was in the car with my older sister and mom one day.
Mom: You know, if you have a boyfriend now, its ok, you’re old enough to meet nice boys.
Sister: Thanks mom, I know, and no I don’t have a boyfriend.
Mom: Good because if you do, I’ll kill you.

and it reminded of what my mum said over Skype last weekend...

Mum: "You enjoyed Spain a lot? Not scared travelling alone?"
Me: "I love it! I met so many girls who were travelling alone, somemore they're travelling for months and not just 10 days like me...I think they're very inspiring!"
Mum: "Only women who're not married can do such things...you also want to be like them??" *hint*
Me: "How you know I won't meet a guy when I'm travelling??"
(we continued on the subject til we talked bout my studies...)
Mum: "Aiyoo...now I know how your viva's like, I'm very worried..."
Me: "Don't worry, I fast fast find a guy now, if fail then just go get married...hahahaha!"
Mum: "No no, you better study hard, no need worry bout finding bf..."
Me: "You said the same when I was 16...hahaha"
Mum: "..."

Don't you just love your MaMa? <3

For more laughs,
go to http://mymomisafob.com or http://mydadisafob.com

Star to Dust

2009-07-07T20:49:00.003+01:00

With eyes blurred by tears...

The greatest on earth returns to dust when all here is done.

Memorial service of Michael Jackson was indeed a reminder to all...a reminder to love one another, to not judge by skin colors, , to make a difference with blessings, to not condemn by discrimination, to live life, to realise dreams and to make the world a better place!

He was a very talented entertainer, a global icon, a musician and above all, a humanitarian. A lover of life, a lover of human race, a believer in God.

A star's slipped away...into heaven, where all is good and all is fine :)

我不是公主，我是女王

2009-06-01T21:09:00.003+01:00

(以下是一个自主，独立，个人意见非常强，但有一点点浪漫女生的独白；如您恨恶偶像剧，可选择不悦/阅 )

整整21集的剧情，却没有一刻让我觉得乏味。我想其中一个大因素是女主角让我隐约看到了自己。
我还没33岁，但是不知道为什么我总觉得有一天我会像她一样...当然不希望那么曲折，but who knows?

自问没有足够的勇气，也没有多余的信心。但是我还是相信幸福不是梦想，而是实实在在的。我从不赞同 ‘爱情饮水饱’，一直都认为面包比爱情实际...所以我还在等待，等待一个看见我的坚持与理想，原则与自信的Mr Right. 你说我天真？Maybe...但既然等了那么多年，等多几年又算什么呢？

我在努力让自己变得更棒，因为有一天我要听他说：“你是我的女王！”

When there's sun...

2009-05-30T18:26:00.006+01:00

...there's life!

Whenever it gets sunny here, I tend to feel the town's come to life again! Not that it's usually 'dead', but as the temperature rises, the cars look better and the people look EVEN better ;)
(No, I can't explain why but I'm sure the sun's one of the factors ;p)

For the first time in almost 2 years, I walked on the streets today with bare shoulders and sandals on my feet!
Sunnies, ice cream, miniskirts = sweetness!!

Sunny weekends like this make stressful days at work less significant...just like that!
Although it's gonna end somehow, but at least I treasure this moment of contentness.

---

Life can be so simple if you want it to be. With a cousin going through chemo, an uncle's recovering from an operation, a dear mentor fighting off Bell's Palsy...I think of many things rather indifferently. I guess couting your blessings, big or small, does make life less difficult.

I know many of us are at a point in life where every decision seems to matter so much yet we don't have the slightest idea what to decide on...or we're at a new phase where everything seems so different than what we expected and we struggle to stay the same...or maybe only you can tell me what's with life now that's making you breathless...but whatever it is, I believe it's just a transition.
One leading to the unknowns.
One leading to dreams yet to be realised.
One that's worth anticipating ;)

It's been a while...

2009-05-22T22:01:00.003+01:00

...since I wrote or felt like writing.

Lots happened in the past month or so...revisited Amsterdam and back, struggled but managed through my 2nd year assessment (part 1 that is...), in the process of getting bits together for a publication (ASAP I hope!)...oh it's the time of the year again, when every deadline seems to fall on the same day and it's tomorrow! *panic panic panic*

Every time when I feel like I'll die of anxiety, I think of home. I wish I can get my ticket home right now and fly the next day! I know I can't, but no harm imagining I suppose??

A little bubbly and a little Red at times like this do help! Drink and make yourself comfortable, drink and talk like there's no one around, drink and laugh at the top of your lungs...oh just drink and let yourself loose! Girls need a glass or two when you've no one but yourself ;p

I'm sure the coming month will be tougher than expected and it WILL be challenging! But hey, my reward's waiting for me at the end of it...so I just gotta WORK it!

The year's coming to its next half and I can't believe it. Time does fly after all...when you least notice it. I've planned the next half, I just wonder how much would work. Oh well, having plans always better than having none?

I think the alcohol's sinking into me...only now...lucky ;)

Let's do a cat stretch!

2009-04-25T22:31:00.007+01:00

Inhale, exhale...and stretchhhhhhh!

I'm so well-stretched today!
It's my very first time doing Yoga and I think I'll grow to like it a lot :) It feels really good to know that my body can do a lot more than I expected and just letting every single spine loose feels extremely relaxing! It's amazing how the mind and body work so well together, that's IF you let them.

The instructor said, "Listen to your body...and breath."

How often do you pay attention to your breathing? And how often do you let your mind rest?
Not by force, but au naturel?
I haven't, and I didn't realise how much I needed it until today.
My mind was literally emptied at the end of the 75 minutes.
I was calm. I was relaxed. I was rejuvenated.

(I'm aching all over now, but I guess that only means I've put my muscles to good use ;p)

By the way, the days are getting longer, so summer's REALLY near . Finally!! :)

Meow~

My Treasure Box

2009-04-23T18:30:00.004+01:00

Have you ever had things that you only keep to yourself?
I do, lots of them!

Whether it's that love poem from donkey years ago, or the air ticket and boarding pass from my first trip abroad, not forgetting the name badges from school AND the little notes passed around in class! Yes, I've ALL sorts in my boxes! Every little token reminds me of a chapter in life, a page in my own book of "Growing Up" and the many phases I've been through before getting to where I am today...do you call them 'memories'? Or do you prefer 'experience'? Whatever it is, life wouldn't be as rich as it is without any of it...be it the anger, excitement, misery, happiness and all emotions that only you, ONLY you would know. Keep them as your treasure, but don't let the weight of it burdens you. Fill your own box with whatever you want, open it once in awhile for a smile or a pat on the shoulder, but never ponder too long til everything comes alive again...! Instead, keep filling til the day they all turn into gems and you'd know it's all worth it ;)

A reason

2009-04-10T20:08:00.005+01:00

For everything that happens, there's a reason.

At your worst, you find your dearest.

At your lowest, you find your ladder.

At your weakest, you find your pillar(s) of strength.

At your darkest, you find your light.

For everything that happens, there's a lesson.

I've been through one of my worst days. I've no way to explain the reason behind all the happenings but I know what's important now is to get over them and continue to be myself. Some things changed, some things don't. My perspectives of the world around us have inevitably altered. I want to make things better but I know time would do that more efficiently than I myself. I'm dissapointed and angry, but at least I know that I am. I'm not going to lose myself to this. I promise. Whatever it is, there'll be a day when it seems as if none of these has happened. For the time being, I'll wait. Patiently and with lots of love.

After the rain...

2009-04-06T20:29:00.006+01:00

...I see strength.

Strength to overcome differences.

Strength to be courageous.

Strength to realise everyone makes mistakes.

Strength to forgive, thus forget.

After the rain, the ground strengthens.

雨降って地固まる

五味参杂

2009-04-05T13:39:00.005+01:00

A blend of flavours.

尝尽了酸甜苦辣, 有些味道真得不太想回味, 有些却久久不能忘怀.

This week's longer than any ordinary week.
I'm strained. Physically, mentally and emotionally.

简单的一碗白饭, 原来有无比神奇的力量, 我发现了!

Now I'm rejuvenated.

从煮到吃, 我找到快乐 :)

Of All Sorts

2009-03-15T21:07:00.006Z

of Now
I'm currently feeling very 'bland'. Everything's going on a routine. Every weekday's almost the same, as well as every weekend. I used to think I'm one who enjoys routines, but now I kinda wish for perks and spices. Call me greedy, call me moody, call me whatever you like...nothing really bothers me now. I wonder am I attention-deprived or is it something else that I'm looking for?

of Insecurity
I got this from doing a quiz:

"What are you most afraid of:- You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you."

The statement is true and I've realised it since I could remember. I started sleeping by myself at a very young age and staying at a place alone is never a problem for me. I have a 'thing' which I call 'trauma-phobia'. What does it mean? It means I'm always imagining the worst of tragedies, the possibilities of loss, the intensity of hatred and everything that would leave me alone. I grew up with no siblings and the thought of losing is constantly playing in my head. I believe in God and I believe in heaven, and thank God I do as it's what keeps me hopeful. Life IS fragile in many ways and I'm reminded of this every now and then. Many see me as very independent and am I glad?
Yes, only cause I want to be and I need to be.

of Obsession
Spending hourS watching someone else's lives is not the healthiest thing to do but you can't help it. Having fantasies at the wildest measures is not the most realistic idea but you can't help it. Trying to understand lines in a foreign tongue is not the smartest but you can't help it. Feeling sad, happy, mad, jealous and whatever-you-have under the sun for people who are mere characters is really not the most sane but you can't help it.
You are obsessed, that's all :)

of Criterias
You choose because you've a choice. You select because you ought to be selective. You eliminate because you know the consequences. You measure because you want a fit.
You wait because you know you're worth it.

of Cooking
Always think to be able to cook is cool! To be able to serve good food to my loved ones is even cooler!! I'm on my way to make myself the coolest ;)

of Age
I don't feel the age (that much) anymore.

of Blog
Very high demand of maintenance.

差异

2009-03-04T14:12:00.006Z

我要说的是文化和语言的差异。

从来不觉得语言和文化是如此的窃窃相关，现在懂了。
原来一些话不应该想说就说，因为说者无意，听者却有心；
而且可能伤透了心。
在我说来只是闲话一句，但对听的却是话中有话。
在我听来语义重重，他却说的自然自在。
谁对谁错？
只是差异。

当语言是一种隔阂，很多事变得很复杂。
简单的一句问候，往往会被误会成一种调侃。
玩笑可能永远没有笑声，问题可能永远没有答案。
是问题不当，还是幽默太黑？
只是差异。

解决方案：
1. 心胸广阔
2. 努力了解
3. 坦然以对
4. 大事化小
5. 豁然开朗

差异无所不是，或大或小，或少或多，只看能跨越与否。

人生又上了一课：思而后言

Undefined

2009-03-01T16:34:00.003Z

The title says it all.
I've been in such mode for the past month and I still couldn't find myself a good reason...yet.
I'm a bit lost with words.
I'm a bit lost with myself.
Til I find my way out...stay tuned.

庆祝

2009-01-25T17:38:00.005Z

重复听了这首歌好几遍，觉得好有意思。
农历新年对我来说，真的就是与家人朋友团聚的日子。。。
不管是谈过去或是将来，只要在一起就是祝福。

绽放了你的笑来庆祝新年到
传统的佳节你别忘了
在妈妈的怀抱她哼的新春歌谣
每一字一句还在耳边绕
不管男女老少接过了大红包
恭喜你祝福你少不了
年初一到元宵处处都是好预兆
吃口年糕你我会步步高
春来到画个圈圈做记号
每年都来团圆好不好
相约好从今以后直到老
我们都要记住这一朝

来庆祝来祝福
所有思念来倾诉
一年又一年
不管多忙碌
家中有等你回家的父母
就是最大的财富
来庆祝来祝福
老朋友一起欢呼
经过这些年
重逢就满足
前尘和往事都历历在目
原来已经值得庆祝

第二年不在家过年了。。。
已学会释怀，接受。
我随离家很远，但我觉得我的心是靠近的。

祝合家安康，幸福快乐

剩女

2009-01-23T13:59:00.004Z

今天看了一则新闻

http://www.6park.com/news/messages/11897.html

想说，我会不会有一天也需要做同样的事？

再想一想，我可能真的需要，但是我没有勇气，也太爱面子了！

哈哈 ^^

Away & Back

2009-01-19T19:47:00.007Z

A little over 3 weeks of pure leisure and fun ended last night :(
It's back to work and reality tomorrow...I dreaddddddddd!
It's not even 8pm and I'm already sleepy...jet-laggedddddd... >.<
Let's just sleep, nite!

离别依依

2009-01-12T13:31:00.005Z

我以为这一次会容易一点，但没有。

自从大学第一年开始，家变得较像酒店。逗留的时间都不超过三个月，回到家的时候总在想几时又得离开。。。心情真的很沮丧！

我不喜欢离别，因为我爱哭。
如果说女人是水做的，我肯定我是，而且比别人多很多很多。
每一次都很努力告诉自己不要哭，但屡试屡败！
我真的舍不得，非常舍不得！

你问，“舍不得什么？”
我说，“所有，全部！
爸妈，婆婆，狗，床，妈煮的菜，带有雷电的倾盆大雨，朋友，喝茶，菜市，红豆冰，还有热热的阳光，沙滩！”

我现在了解原来时间不能让家变得不像家。
家，永远是家。
不管离开多久，还是改变多少，
家在我心里还是一样。。。
还是让我很舍不得！

我知道我还是会哭，我也懂我不能做什么。。。
我知道我需要好几个星期来重新适应，
适应离开，适应想念，适应一个人。
但，我懂，很快我又会回来了!
只希望真的很快！

写着写着，眼泪又掉了。

New Year New Hope New Beginning

2009-01-01T15:41:00.005Z

A new calendar.
A new start.
A new year.

Let the year be filled with smiles and goodness for all :)

Another year

2008-12-31T08:37:00.010Z

It always feels that time DOES fly at this time of the year, one last day to go, a year's passed, another to come.

This year's been a very challenging but interesting one for me.
I went through the happiest as well as the worst moments on my own. I visited countries which I never expect myself to go at 25. I did so much to be recollected by words. Despite the tears and the dissapointments, it's all good :)

To have this year ends at home is the best gift of all. I do miss all the pamperings and attention after all. I've almost forgotten how blue the sky is half way across the globe...but thank God I'm back! Although it's not for long, but I do appreciate each and everyday spent at home. To see my parents and family again really beat everything else! I guess home always remains home.

I am sure 2009 will be another great one to look forward to! ;D

Happy New Year & may God bless you.

xoxo

Faces 2008

2008-12-22T13:06:00.006Z

A summary of my year. A summary of me.

Fast, no Fast? Smell, no smell?

2008-12-17T22:12:00.003Z

I had my first KFC meal in more than a year and it felt...weird?

I don't know what's wrong, the meat's crunchy, the bread's soft, the fries were great with ketchup...
BUT...
Let's just say I won't want to have one for another year...?

Btw, I finally got myself the scent I wanted and contemplated over a LONG time!
Gonna smell so Hugo Femme-ish this Christmas and New Year :))

Be a Santa & Run!!

2008-12-14T16:44:00.011Z

I huffed and I puffed and I did it!! :D

A Santa suit
A chilly winter morning
A new pair of trainers
An adventurous mate
A heart for charity *wink*

2,500 Santas did it with me!

5K under 45 min, I made it!!
I actually got a medal!! *woots*

I panted but I didn't faint ;) Thank God!

In my super big T and Santa pants!

My very first time on the ice!! (AND I didn't fall *phew*)

My new year resolution = make this a skill!

This Christmas is already special because of this run.

Lesson of the day : To take life out of its box for a minute can make a simple day extraordinary :)

Merry Christmas folks!!

I want!

2008-12-10T16:24:00.008Z

My lappie's very sick AND I'm exhausted.

Ohhhhhhhh... I wanna go home!!!~~~~

I wanna have kolok mee and teh C peng for breakfast!

I want Mum's yam cake!

I want Granny's fishball!

I want Dad's...uhh...hug! :p

I want my bed!

I want to walk out in shorts and T-shirt!

I want to talk all night with Cuz!

I want to see my girlfriends!

I want roti canai!

I want char kueh tiao!

I want to cut my hair!

I want to go to the beach!

I want Astro!

I want sunshine!

I WANT TO GO HOME!!!!

Smashin' 25!

2008-11-17T09:44:00.004Z

I'm 25 and celebrating :D

Of love and what comes after...

2008-11-14T23:47:00.005Z

This week I heard of confession, proposal, engagement, wedding and break up.

So I ask, what comes after love?
Or maybe there's no before or after as love is meant to be forever?
I'm sure that's the way it ought to be, now and ever.
Or is it?

Topic-less

2008-11-14T22:28:00.014Z

Beginning of randomness

---

This is my collection of Dorothy Koomson's books.

Definitely my favourite author of the year!

I've four of her five books and have read 4 so far :D
They're actually my very first and only purchase from Amazon!

The first I read was 'My Best Friend's Girl' which I picked up from the local library and It got me hooked, right there right then! I cried through half the book but it ended with a smile...so warm I could feel it inside out. From there I went on to 'Marshmallows for Breakfast', 'The Cupid Effect' then her most recent 'Goodnight Beautiful'. Every story's its own twists and turns, but all are heart warming I reckon.

Dorothy's a British author so it makes her stories so much easier to relate myself to, especially when I'm in this very country myself at the time reading. I like the way she portraits women as intellectual and yet always emotional. Love in her stories is never fairytale-like, rather more realistic and down to earth...just the way I would imagine and probably want it to be. Relationship can be more than what's between a man and a woman. On top of that, she's probably one of the few who creates great endings. Endings which linger for a long while after that last page, endings which make the heart pounds one beat faster...endings which make you want to read the book again!

Of course it's gotta do with personal preference, but do give it a try if you don't mind a book?

---

My 'friends' at my work-desk--a Carebear (Sunshine), a US$ 7 brain cell, an Olympus bear and a purple virus.

Four and not one costs me anything. One's 'adopted', others given and taken. They watch me work. They make me less lonely. They sit and they stay. Hopefully the family grows... *griNnZz*

---

This is my hair now...

and I think this is my longest ever!

Yup, longest in 25 years...I'm never a long-hair girl, always love myself better with short and whenever I hear guys say they like girls with long hair, I'll go "Typical..." with a grunt ;p
Reason my hair's grown so long (longer than I would like it) this year due to absence of preferable hairstylist *grumbles* I actually cant wait to chop it off!!

---

Some days are just SO beautiful you wonder who's painted the sky in such vibrant colours...

---

Sometimes happiness is to watch others play...

---

I just wrote and you just read.

---

End of Randomness

November

2008-11-01T21:31:00.006Z

My favourite month :)

It's Fall and I love everything bout it.
The chill. The colours. The mystique.

I went out for one purpose--to capture scenes like this...

BUT I ended up in the city...where street music's everywhere...

This is what makes Glasgow a little special ;)

AND I splurged :(
Among the few (yes, ONLY a few ;p) things I bought....
look what I've got!!

Ta-daaaa!!!~

Arent them SOOOOOO cutttteeee???
YES YES YES!! :D

Btw, they're going to bed with me tonite...keke...happiness!!~~

奶茶蛋塔

2008-10-18T22:48:00.005+01:00

很努力在跑步机上烧了350卡，得意！
不搭巴士，走到中式饼点，累！
“蛋塔奶茶，唔该！”
奶茶是茶包泡的，蛋塔不是我吃过最好吃的，
但心情没有比此刻更爽的!

我喜欢一个人的下午，
懒洋洋的，写意的。

我喜欢逛超市，
买我想买的，选我想吃的。

我喜欢一个人，
简单的，快乐的。

我喜欢奶茶蛋塔，
热热的，甜甜的，香香的，脆脆的。

我就喜欢！

This time around...

2008-10-11T14:11:00.006+01:00

Everything has a first. And eventually there is a second.

Second Autumn
I don't remember when did the leaves turn brown last year, but I'm sure the chill comes much earlier this time around. It's less wet this year...? I'm not too sure, but I'm never as prepared as I am now. The clock's going to be changed in 3 weeks, 'Hello' to shorter days. Snow in March? I wish for more in December. No sunlight for 3 months? I STILL don't like the idea, but this time around I'll have a sunny New Year :)

Second Year
I am learning. But a whole load of new things! I remember when I first learn how to use that irritating (still!) machine, my hands went cold. This time around, I feel much more comfortable but it still makes me nervous at times. I am learning techniques which I thought would be IMPOSSIBLE to learn just a year ago. This time around, I know I HAVE to and I actually CAN do it! I thank God for a great teacher :) I am no more a freshie. I've no more excuse. I just have to buck up and make it happen! I hope I can. I wonder how will the third be...

This time around...
I hate the rain less.
I have more friends and I cherish each and everyone.
I have less trouble understanding the cashier and the bus driver.
I still take up the Demonstrator's job and enjoy it.
I know my way around better.

This time around...
I hope I still go 'awww..' seeing those trees go bold.
I hope I still jump when I see snow in the morning.
I hope my enthusiasm doesn't fade.
I hope I try and work my very best!

This time around...
I know I'll be just fine :)

DIY 'n' I

2008-09-28T23:31:00.009+01:00

I just wish IKEA does furniture assembly for free... *sigh*

Not that I can't do it myself, BUT... *sigh*

I got myself a swivel chair and a drawer set. The drawer set's not my favourite, but hey, the others are just TOO heavy for me to bring home on my own WITHOUT a car AND a bf >.<
(These 2 are already 17kgs all together btw...)

My new comfier chair :)

Pretty neat huh?

AND and and...

I bought a Dorothy Perkins dress!
NO, there's no date, no wedding to attend, no party, no reason at all!!
The ONLY sensible excuse to save me from ALL the guilt is it's on 50% discount -___-
I didn't think I could fit into it, who knows it did! *blame the luck*
I really have NO idea when and where I shall wear it...
AND I can't be ONE inch fatter if I'd still wanna wear it when the time comes...
Ohhhhh why did I even buy it?!?!

Trying VERY hard ;p

Now, shall I just return it?

女孩当自强

2008-09-27T22:47:00.004+01:00

给所有曾经因爱哭过，伤过的姐姐妹妹们

．．．
．．
．

拜托眼泪又不是钻石珍珠 ,一直在哭难道你能一夜之间暴富
是谁告诉你有王子这动物, 还不如你自己骑上白马比较靠谱
失恋失去所有美丽的错误, 快开香槟为你能够死里逃生庆祝
没错他就是不合身的衣服, 赶快脱掉换身行头再去爱里跳舞
我知道一定有一点辛苦
但我们的心都要坚固
告别了错的人不算输
是我们更加靠近幸福
爱情卷起万重浪(越危险的游戏越让人全力以赴)
我们女孩当自强(可以小鸟依人也能自我保护)
大不了受一点伤(昨天的伤口会变成明天的礼物)
会让我们更漂亮
看吧天还是会亮会再日出,粉身碎骨剧痛之后就能脱胎换骨
浪费时间饲养青蛙当宠物,省下力气足够拯救全宇宙的动物
失恋失去一个懦弱的叛徒,快放烟火为下一次遇见英雄欢呼
没错你该穿上更美的礼服,带上微笑从从容容再去爱里跳舞
你知道一定有一点辛苦
但我们的心都很坚固
结束了错的梦不算输
是我们值得更加幸福
爱情卷起万重浪(越危险的游戏越让人全力以赴)
我们女孩当自强(可以小鸟依人也能自我保护)
大不了受一点伤(昨天的伤口会变成明天的礼物)
会让我们更漂亮(top girl都要做自己的救世主)
谁怕爱情万重浪(越危险的游戏越让人义无反顾)
我们女孩当自强(是最勇敢坚强也最温柔贤淑)
不用谁施舍阳光(好的坏的都是收获而不是包袱)
我们自己是太阳

-S.H.E-

我听了，不知道为什么，笑了。。。觉得很有意思　：）

The Feel-GOOD-Factor

2008-09-27T19:46:00.003+01:00

I cut my finger and it's pretty deep...but no, that's not the point ;p

Have you ever had one of those crappy days when you feel EVERYthing's going wrong?
Or one of those afternoons when you sit around and have practically NOTHING to do?
Or maybe one of those nights when loneliness seems overwhelming?
Or just one of those moments you feel...empty?

Well, try some of my feel-GOOD-factors:
1. A cup of hot tea and a bite of sweets
2. A pot of soup made after hours of stirring and tasting
3. A pretty coat of nail polish
4. An ice cream
5. A generous spray of your favourite perfume
6. A sweep of mascara on your not-too-long eyelashes
7. A bubble bath for hourssss...
8. A book (a GOOD one of course!)
9. A bag of crisps AND a can of coke!
10. A smokey eye DIY trial
11. A tint of lip gloss
12. A fashion show in your own room :D
13. A spoonful of peanut butter or Nutella spread *heavenly*
14. A pedicure and manicure at the comfort of your own home
15. An instant noodle feast!
16. (fill in your own)
17. (-ditto-)
18...19...20...

There's only ONE rule--make yourself happy ;)

C.R.A.P.

2008-09-17T23:31:00.005+01:00

Menstrual cramp + 13 hours of lab work + 10-min lunch + 3-in-1 oatmeal for dinner = CRAP >.<

I need chicken soup with a WHOLE bottle of Foochow red wine...
YES, it gotta be THE real thing!!

Arghhhhhh!!!!

月圆人团圆

2008-09-14T23:45:00.003+01:00

“当看到圆月时，就像看到地球另一端的你！”
很土的一句话，但很真实。

---

想家吗？我都说不。
否认只是为了让自己好过一点
。。。
。。
。

看不见您的脸，却能大声的哭诉
这是我寻找很久，毫无保留的松懈
更是我们之间最美的关系。

---

月光倒映在水面
清澈夜空星闪烁
吾家遥遥千里外
心心密系人团圆

Home

2008-09-08T19:51:00.003+01:00

I didn't know I'm THIS desperate to go home until I was told 'No..'

I hope it'll be a 'Yes' in the morning...

All I want is to be home.

P.S. I Love You

2008-09-06T22:16:00.003+01:00

I wanted to watch this movie when it first came out months ago...
and I finally did.
I cried my eyes out!

If I am ever to love a man SO much,
Please, I ask, let us survive time and life.
Please...

Backpacked & Back

2008-09-03T20:11:00.005+01:00

I'm exhausted, accidentally-tanned and back :)

Where from you ask??
Brussels, Bruges (Belgium)
Amsterdam (Netherlands)
Parissssssss (France)

For those who were worried and wondering where I've been, well...I did say I was 'unwrapping' my 'pressie' right??? only this takes 8 days and 7 nights....hehe ;p
Thanks for thinking of me!!! *xoxo*

SO so much to tell but not now...I need some good sleep...oh I SO need!

Before that, can someone please tell me what's wrong with my blog layout??
I see multiple 'boxes' of Photobucket ad, do you?? >.<

Network. Learn. Enjoy.

2008-08-26T15:15:00.010+01:00

That was the theme.

Network
It's difficult to not generate relationship of any sort at an event of 6000 attendees BUT by saying that, it is as hard to build strong connection which would last for more than 5 days. Networking always sounds a tad too formal, I prefer the simple yet elegant way of saying "Let's make friends?" It's just very amazing how people connect with each other and how friendship develops from there...

I met three girls from HK in the oddest possible way--I kinda 'volunteered' to be their guide around the uni (in the rain ><) and we ended up having the best laughs over dinner! And you know what, all 3 are physiotherapists! Tell me, how often would you meet a physiotherapist? and 3 at once?! They now add on to the dozen of medics I met in the past year who all offer free consultation (which I hope I wouldnt need in a short time ;p) The best thing is now I've guides to the BEST food in HK the next time I visit (which will be VERY soon!) :D

Okay, it'll be a big FAT lie if I say I wasn't looking forward to seeing cute guys at the event...so I was! BUT but but...to my dissapointment, actually not that much a dissapointment as it was expected, there wasn't any!!! Oh yea..maybe one or two..but nah..not enough to brighten up my days *cough* I guess it IS a task to find young, good-looking, smart AND fun guys these days...*sigh*
(I'm SO gonna end up a miserable spinster o.O)

Networking is all bout people. And most of the time, people that 'matters'! People that one day might help you climb that corporate ladder, people whom you need to call to get a job, people who might be in the panel of interviewers, people who just MIGHT be of some kind of importance in your life SOMEday. So did I achieve that this time round? I'm not too sure BUT I did give EVERYone a smile...yea, a smile is not enough you say, but that's one of my best assets and I'm generous with it. So live with it ;p

Learn
This ought to be my MAIN purpose among the many others. To learn and to share. Learning can be enjoyable yet tedious. To attend talks and say you've learned from them afterwards can be quite a chore. To learn while sharing is almost the most effective way to get the most out of what you intended to know. Critics and advice are two faces of a mirror. To accept or to reject is all up to oneself. To see and to appreciate what others are doing, whether similar or miles different, do good as a first step towards a wider perspective in what interests you. I always think learning shall not be a quantitative process, but a qualitative one. One that you gain a little at a time but one day that bit shall be the cherry that tops the cake ;) That I learned and am still learning...

Enjoy
To have the authors of the many papers you've read and made a dozen references from coming up to you saying 'Hi' was definitely one of the many enjoyable moments! To have them shaking your hand and telling you to keep up the work is more than a pat on the shoulder! To meet people from all over the world was fun! To have cool baristas making REAL coffee for you all day long was a bonus! To have freebies given out like it's Xmas was superb! Of course, there were the less enjoyable time when the talk was boring, the sandwich was bad, the American was TOO tall, the rain was heavy, the day was long...but no, none of those shall top the good time I had. As I've told myself--enjoy!

Right, that's me for now.

Gonna be unwrapping my 'pressie' for myself in another 12 hours after 3 LONG weeks of waiting...wheee!!!

À bientôt!

Creative (and EASY) Cooking

2008-08-10T14:37:00.007+01:00

I haven't been cooking proper stuff in a while now... The mood's back in the past week and I made these:

Tortizza

Never heard of it?? Well, neither have I :p It's simply a 'pizza' with crust made of tortilla bread (which can be substituted with ready-to-eat roti canai or capati..keke)

1. Spread some pasta sauce/pizza sauce/tomato puree/ (if you really have NOTHING at all, tomato ketchup will do just fine :p) on the bread, then
2. Lay vege/ham/sausage/whatever you have on the bread AND of course cheese! Best would be mozarella, but if you only have those 'Singles' in the fridge, use them! 3. Bake in oven/microwave til cheese melts.

Voila! You've an almost-instant pizza :D

Frittata

A VERY fancy name for omelette-like egg pancake I reckon...and it's easy easy easy! It's my very first time and it turned out fabulous, so I bet anyone can make this :)

1. Have leftover meat?? Use it! I shredded my leftover roasted chicken and stir-fried it with sliced onions and mushrooms. Cant find any mushrooms? Use cabbage/carrots/beans etc. No leftover meat, use luncheon meat/sausages/ham or even no meat at all!
No rules, no stress. Any combination of meat and vege will do!
2. Beat some eggs up (depends how thick you want your frittata to be, I used 3) with bit of milk/cream/water and pinch of salt and pepper to taste.
3. Add cheese or herbs (I used basil, but spring onion will do as well) if you like, I skipped the cheese cos I didn't have any in the fridge and I don't think I need the extra calories ;p
4. Now pour the egg mixture into the pan, covering the meat + vege evenly to form a 'pancake' (use a non-stick flat pan for best result) and cook til the egg's set.
5. Then, you can either put it in the oven to cook for another 5 min or just cook on the stove til egg's all well done.

Yummy frittata in 30 min--perfect for a quick Sunday lunch or a delicious bite when friends are over for a drink!

I'm trying to make the steps as easy and practical (whether you're in an 'angmoh' country like me or back in beautiful Malaysia) as possible cos I want you (yes ALL of you out there!) to try cooking these wonderfully simple dishes and make yourself happy! Yup, good food makes me happy--as easy as that :D

I know I'm not very good at illustrating step-by-step cooking but oh well, I tried? *GrinZz*

If you're REALLY no good at cooking (or simply too lazy *cough*) and you happen to have a blender, you can still make something...

The smoothie!!

1. Cut up fruits of your choice into cubes.
2. Add yogurt and milk; a little lemon juice for an extra zing!
3. Blend at high speed!
4. Enjoy a glass of healthy, yummy and refreshing smoothie!! :D

See, I've something for everyone at all levels *wink*

080808

2008-08-08T17:46:00.005+01:00

The games' begun.
The eyes are on ONE nation.
The opening was spectacular!
May the rest be as brilliant, if not better!

婆婆常说： “要牢记你的根在哪里。。。”
我都答说： “ （我家门牌号码），哈哈！”
但今天看着你们，
身为黄皮肤，黑头发的我，
有一种莫名的骄傲！

华人们，加油！

One Year Today

2008-08-05T22:44:00.005+01:00

-5th Aug 2007-

I arrived.
It was drizzling.
Had Chinese for dinner.

-5th Aug 2008-

I survived!
It's drizzling too.
Had home-cooked Thai style vegetarian green curry.
(I didnt know I missed curry so much that even the quick-mix-curry-in-a-jar tasted good)

AND I bought myself a pressie! One only to be unwrapped in 3 weeks :D

It's been a GOOD year. A jolly good one :)

一年

2008-08-03T21:03:00.005+01:00

是的，365天。

我写，这一年...

机场的门开了，冷冷的风吹来...

我知道，我到了一个与家很不同的地方。

我记得第一次看树叶转黄，然后飘落的悸动...

我也记得那第一场雪的兴奋。

有那么几天，雨下的不停，心情也被彻彻底底地淋湿了。

还有很多个早晨因为天灰而愁眉苦脸。

又有那么几天，一个人吃饭，吃着吃着，眼泪就掉了...

常常怀疑自己到底够不够格，够不够好, 还是...决定错了?

也曾经因为一两句善意的批评，哭了。

讨厌什么都不确定的那几天，

更不喜欢孤单的事实。

但没有忘记提醒自己时时要真诚对待每一个人，每一件事。

一直告诉自己一定要撑着，不可以生病，不可以放弃...

很难，但我却实实在在的过了一年。

现在的我不再为天气而叹气，

也不再让眼泪太容易夺眶。

我在用心，努力地学习...

学习独立，学习面对，学习豁达，学习感恩。

我知道前面的路还长，还远...

但如果今年的祝福满满，接下来的恩典会少吗？

我知道不会。

只因为我的上帝必看顾，带领我。

圣经上说：[你们需用的这一切东西，你们的天父是知道的。你们要先求他的国和他的义，这些都要加给你们了。所以，不要为明天忧虑，因为明天自有明天的忧虑；一天的难处一天当就够了。]

这一年，我真的懂了。

2008-07-29T11:27:00.001+01:00

When you start dabbing areas around your eyes religiously with eye cream day and night, you know ONE thing worries you...age.

DETOX

2008-07-20T08:32:00.011+01:00

I've passed my 36-hr fast and this is me reporting from the 37th hour onwards...

I've just downed 500 ml of lemon juice with an awful loads of salt and it feels yuck >< (I'm actually feeling my worst of the whole fast right now...)

What got this kick-started was a light dinner, VERY light indeed--porridge with peas and carrot :)
A glass of warm milk 4 hours later before I went to bed (cos I could feel the hunger creeping in and I didn't want a hungry sleepless night)

(10 hours later)

Woke up and had a glass of honey water...which actually kept me alive for the rest of the afternoon! Amazing huh?? I was definitely impressed ;) Eh, not like I stayed at home and did nothing okayyyy... I vacuumed the flat, I did my laundry, I cleaned the windows and I went to the Glasgow River Festival! The sun was too good for me to not to go out, so I walked out to the Clyde Harbour (which is a good 15 min away from my place) and enjoyed the crowd! Managed to go on to one of Glasgow's prides, The Tall Ship aka Glenlee. It was kinda fun to find out how a ship is like inside...something like in the Pirates of the Caribbean?? keke..and seeing all the jetskis and speedboats in the river (since I stay at the riverside) was some experience!

The Tall Ship

Cutest sailor-wannabe ;p

The Marines

The Landmark

It's a festival!

I actually got around with an empty tummy and still managed to visit the farmer's market (which is filled with foodies!). Bought myself a pack of sausage (yes, out of all things to do during a fast--self-torture indeed) and walked home...

I didnt faint at my doorstep! Thank God! Felt a little dizzy so I quickly grabbed myself an apple...didn't bite into it like I would usually, but cut it into 6 slices instead. Why? Cos then I'd eat it slowwwwwlyyyy... :D Finished my apple and I felt satisfied...which was a surprise... Had a peach before calling it a night and that's me til 8am today!!

36 hours, definitely sounds more than it is. I never thought I would ever fast (eventhough I always SAY I will), but hey, I did! I FASTED!! I'm glad I'm alright til now, just feel like throwing up, a lil headache and a little weird in the stomach...I hope I'll be better after my breakfast...cant wait!!! ;p

(I've at least 10 toilet runs since I started reporting...thanx to you KH >.<)

Be grateful for food, be glad for being able to eat, be happy for health, be thankful for blessings.

炎夏

2008-07-19T10:25:00.004+01:00

炎炎夏日
空空木椅
是人走了
还是等待

绿绿草地
油油树叶
是刚开始
还是结束

如半杯水
是空是满
是清是浊
只有你懂

夏日到了
深秋近了
寒冬快了
我学会了

"Business" Trip

2008-07-14T19:44:00.016+01:00

Yes, my first "business" trip :)

I decided to attend this symposium for ONE very simple reason...

"I wanna see CAMBRIDGE!"

So I did :D

I don't know bout others, but I definitely have imagined Cambridge more than once in my head... The fact that now I've been there myself still feels bit...surreal? But it's no less awesome! I'm just glad my very first meeting as a 'future academic' (ummm...most preferred term to call myself rather than researcher/scientist/labnut...><) happened here. It's a milestone and I'm sure it's one of the many more to come.

Cambridge. I spent 4 hours walking around with a lousy map, a bag of cherries, a camera and showers in between. Still, Cambridge didn't fail me :) It defines history and knowledge. It potraits sense and sensibility. I especially like how freely people ride around in their bikes...never know guys can look SO adorably cute on 2-wheelers ;p The River Cam is very much like it's described in stories and poems. Quaint and romantic. Yes, very much like that. All in all, I like the place. A lot.

One of the many churches on my way

The King's College

St Mary's

Old Folks Old Town

The Bike

The River Cam

The Punts

........
.....
...
..
.

(My tribute to the VAINest of all--NIC!)

Ta-daaaaa!!!

A Humble Vanity Fair

Ok, now back to the REAL purpose of this trip...

The Noob

This is what's made my past 2 weeks almost suffocating...I guess that made it felt even better afterwards. It's great meeting people from all over. Some as far as the States and India, some as near as Edinburgh. Seeing others doing work of all sorts had somehow refreshed my enthusiasm. Confidence built when I saw interest in others' eyes. Networking was re-defined. I always knew I'm a people-person and people make science a lot more interesting, this I know better now.

This trip's served my initial, innocent aim to SEE Cambridge.
Yup, been there, seen it, done it!
But I've picked up so much more than just the town itself. The people. The acquaintances. The compliments. The advice. The chats. The feedbacks. The ideas. The experience.

The 'so-many-others'.

I'm glad :)

Phewww

2008-07-09T22:05:00.001+01:00

Finally...I can breath again...

You know when...

2008-07-05T18:49:00.004+01:00

...you're a kid and you don't feel like going to school, you'll pretend to have a tummyache?
I so wish I could do that now and just hide under my sheets for dayssss...

...people ask, "So when are you going home?"
I so not wanna answer cos it's still a LONG time to go...

...others doubt, "Are you sure? Absolutely??"
I SO am NOT sure, not anymore...

It's not the first time...

2008-07-02T18:32:00.005+01:00

I feel this low.
I hate it when I feel that I've not done good enough...
I hate it more when I feel that I should've done what I've not...

But you know what, it's not my first and I KNOW it won't be the last...
I tell myself, "Hang in there!"
Just hang in there.

5-7-5

2008-06-25T18:50:00.008+01:00

ふるいけや
かわずとびこむ
みずのおと

Furuike ya
Kawazu tobikomu
Mizu no oto

An old pond
A frog jumps in—
the sound of water.

-Matsuo Bashō-

Summer's day shower,
My mind ponders and wonders,
When am I to rest?

Where has the sun gone?
My eyes desperate to shine,
May the time be kind.

-Yours truly-

I bet on YOU!

2008-06-13T22:19:00.003+01:00

Havent seen such a good love comedy since 'The Holiday'.
Rekindered my belief in meeting THE one!
Proven proposal can be as simple as down on one knee and nothing else *swoons*
Now, where are YOU for me to put my bets on??

Btw, Ashton Kutcher is Hot HOT HOTTTT!!! <3

Current Obsession

2008-06-08T21:58:00.005+01:00

The answer is MUFFINzzzzzz...
be it the lemon & white choc, tripleberry or the chocoChoc...
I just can't seem to have enough >.<

Current energy level: super-uber LOW

Current enthusiasm: Unsatisfactory

Current mood: Not-near-the-best

Current thought: Where do I go from here??

Shall we dine?

2008-06-01T20:44:00.016+01:00

I've always enjoyed making my food look pretty...
The better word would be 'presentable'.
Yes, even though the table's only set for one (that's me!)
It matters. At least to me, it does ;)

Baked salmon with baby greens and herb potatoes

I've always believed that if the food looks good, it'll not taste too much worse!

Baked trout with mixed leaves and potatoes

To have supermarket-ready food as it is and straight from its packaging IS NOT the same when you lay them out on the plate and add some twist of your own to it!

Salmon with Moroccan cous cous (from M& S) and salad

Breaded Alaskan Pollock with spiced lentil salad

By now, some of you would've noticed...

"Why do I only see fish?!"
"You dont even LIKE fish!"

Ahuh, I still don't but I like them better than before (comparatively that is ;p)
And no, not cos I suddenly fall in love with fish and eat them everyday...
BUT I'm working towards a meatLESS diet...for almost a month now.
Yes you hear me right, MEAT-less! As in no chicken, beef, mutton...whatever's in the carnivore's list.

o.O

Don't give me that face and I'll tell you why...hehe

1. Fish IS good (a fact which I've denied for many years now >.<)
2. To keep myself healthy and fit.
3. It's a self-challenge thingy which has been on my mind for some time now...
4. Fish is much less hassle to cook.
5. No meat means less fat?

I'm not going 100% NO meat (trust me it's tough..), just much less on a daily basis; which means I only take the once-in-a-fortnight chicken soup (which my mum insisted), the ham and spam in sandwiches I buy, the meat at dinner parties and during vacation. Since I can't possibly go total vegan, so I choose fish (sad but that's bout the ONLY option) to substitute the meat...

So now you get my meatless idea??

Well, to help make the whole eat-well-live-well practice more efficient, I'm also off fastfood (McD, KFC, Pizza Hut, Burger King and whatever that you've got!). Yup, I'm trying my VERY best to stay in this 'no burger no fries' state for at least a year IF possible...at least til I step on M'sian soil...LOL

It IS very hard especially avoiding the meat and junk food sections in the supermarket as well as ignoring that big billboard telling me what's new at McD...but since I've gotten myself started on this, why give up eh? Of course there'll be days of exception, but well, at least I'm trying?

To top the effort off, here's a sweet toast!

Shortcakes with strawberries and cream

So, wanna dine at mine? ;)

爱与哀

2008-05-19T15:26:00.012+01:00

这一震，把世界都摇醒了！
这一次，是最后还是最初？
这一天，最大国低头了。

当家成灰的时候，天还会亮吗？
当血在流的时候，还想再活吗？
当丧亲失爱的时候，痛还只是痛吗？

最苦的，可能是现在吧？
最难的，是哀悼还是释怀？
最强的，是活着。

哀，
有爱就会过去
。。。
。。
。